She works hard for the money...

Today I continued my on-going search for a job. I've been actively looking for one since May. (Before that, my job was planning a wedding from 2,000 miles away.) I have applied for 30+ jobs so far and not even an inkling of an interview yet. I don't remember it being this hard or depressing last time I was jobless.

I'm not sure who is to blame. I like to blame the state of the country. Times are tough, we are at a 8-9% unemployment rate. I've been told employers are able to be pickier since they have a larger pool of applicants to pull from. And when I think about that, I think maybe I'm to blame. What do I have that makes me stand out above anyone else?

I have applied to jobs where "they would be idiots not to at least interview me" (as I have told my husband time and time again). I guess there are a lot of "idiots" out there. Even when I apply to jobs where I am perfectly qualified (heaven forbid I have TOO much experience, because that is unacceptable), I still don't get even as much as a call or email back. The response from jobs hasn't been negative per say, just non existent.

I am a few months away from being unemployed for a whole entire year. I have a college degree, years of work experience under my belt and various specialized skills. But alas, out of desperation, I am back to applying for retail jobs (something I said I wouldn't do again). I need to be making money again, not just for me but for my husband. It's not just about the money but I need something for to wake up in the morning. I need something to DO. I've proven myself to be very bad at keeping myself occupied with productive things.

I will admit, there is a small (medium) part of me that would rather have less money and more free time than to sell my soul to retail. But my life is no longer just about me, it's about me and my husband. And he wants me to have a job, no matter what kind of job, just a job where I'm bringing home the bacon and doing my part.

And so, I continue to search for jobs, apply for jobs, and wait.

And I wonder if settling for retail is what put me in this whole predicament to begin with.